Charming, but single

He called again tonight. I was almost speechless when I looked at the caller ID. We talked for about 25 minutes again.

He asked when my bedtime was, and I couldn’t tell if that was a hint that he wanted me to come over. I have to be at work at 6:30 a.m. to leave with my boss and my boss’ boss to go to a meeting two hours away, so I couldn’t have gone even if he had blatantly asked.

Still …

The most frustrating thing is that he still hasn’t asked me out. And it’s driving me crazy. Calling and e-mailing me has to mean he likes me … so why doesn’t he just do it? I mean, I don’t bite (unless provoked or encouraged).

He did one thing that annoyed me. He brought up this girl who is friends with my friend. She and T made out at a party one time. And then she slept with his good friend. So, anyway, I was annoyed that he asked if I went out with her, and I tried to reply without sounding bitchy. (I don’t think that worked.)

Anyway, I think I’m going to call him Wednesday before we go out for drinks to see if I can encourage him to come have one with me, even though he’s pretty much said no to going out during the week. We’ll see. Maybe if I sort of kind of ask him out (but not really), he’ll get the picture that I like him a lot.

I don’t know why I’m so freaked out by all of this. It’s been so long since I did the traditional courting thing. I know T is typically more traditional and conservative than he’s been with me, so the best I can hope is that he’s trying to bring this back to his pace of things, which seems to be less about hooking up and more about traditional dating.

But really, why is this so odd? A guy I like is calling me and talking to me about my day and my life. He’s asking about what books I’m reading. He wants to know what I think about things. This is actually what I’ve been saying I wanted …

Why the hell does it feel so weird?

So, I’m sitting around Saturday doing a whole lot of nothing when the phone rings. I figured it was one of my friends calling to give me an update on our plans for the evening.

Nope. It was T.

First, I stared at the caller ID in disbelief. After not calling me for weeks and then sending flirty e-mails, he FINALLY decided to call me. I didn’t know whether to be happy or annoyed.

Then I got excited and giggled and rejoiced in the sound of my own ringtone.

Then I remembered that I couldn’t just look at the phone, rather I needed to actually answer it to talk to him. I swear, I had smoother dealings with my sixth grade boyfriend than with this boy. I’d say I am as immature as a 12 year old, but I used to have game back then, apparently.

So, I answered the phone (right before it clicked over to voicemail), trying not to sound overly excited, but still wanting to sound happy.

He didn’t even really say who it was — he just jumped into, “How are you doing?” and asked if I’d finished Anna Karenina. I told him I was on page 400, mentioned my new job and how it kept me busy. He mentioned that he, too, was in a new job, which totally thrills me because he had been working afternoons and nights, so it made hanging out ridiculous. He started the whole conversation off so casually, as if we talked all of the time and he hadn’t neglected to call for weeks.

We talked for about a half hour. It was cool, but I have to admit that I’m not a HUGE fan of the phone. I don’t mind talking a little bit, but I hate having a conversation for much more than 10 minutes with someone who lives in town. I’d rather just have coffee or drinks or dinner with the person.

This was the first time he seemed shy to me. It wasn’t that the conversation wasn’t good, just that he was a bit more timid than I’m accustomed to getting from him. (My friends said that I’m crazy and that he’s always been a shy person and that he only seems to not be shy around me, which was a nice compliment but probably not entirely true.)

So, he paused and I asked what he was doing that evening. (Because we’d been on the phone for almost half an hour and I’d yet to discern his purpose for calling, other than to chat. I have nothing against chatting, but most men I’ve encountered don’t call just to chat.) He said he was hanging out for a little bit before going home for a friend’s engagement party. (His family lives two or so hours away from my town.)

So, we couldn’t get together last night. I was disappointed, but I tried not to let it show to much in my voice. He kind of stumbled over his closing, and I was worried that he maybe thought I was annoyed, so I said, “I enjoyed talking to you. Call me so we can hang out soon.” He replied that he would like that and that was that.

The boy literally called just to chat. After not speaking to me for six weeks and flirting through e-mail, he called to talk to me and didn’t ask me out. I left the door wide open and he never did. We even talked about Wednesday night martinis, and he said he didn’t like to go out for drinks late during the week. I said, “It just takes a little self control, that’s all.” He shot back, “In case you haven’t been able to tell, self-control is not one of my strong points.” And the he laughed this flirty laugh that punctuated his sentiment well. Regardless of what he may have meant, I heard, “I can’t control myself around you because you are HOT and CHARMING and WONDERFUL and SEXY.”

But then he didn’t ask me out, which kind of lessened the whole “HOT and CHARMING and WONDERFUL and SEXY” sentiment.

It is a good thing that he called and nice to know what he was doing so that I didn’t wonder if he was going to call me Saturday night. But the whole thing left me confused. Is he really so shy that he can’t ask me out? How can he be so brazen as to practically drag me out of a New Year’s party one night and then not even ask me out after a 30-minute conversation?

I’m am perplexed, yet slightly excited and totally sexy-feeling.

Sort of.

Songs I’ve had stuck in my head this week:

• “Isn’t She Lovely” and “Part-Time Lover” by Stevie Wonder (Damn American Idols on the TV all of the time)
• “At Last” by Etta James
• “That’s Life” by Frank Sinatra (Came on twice while I was having drinks the other night. I’ve been singing it in traffic since then)
  
• “Thinking Over” by Dana Glover (I don’t even know how this one ended up on my computer or who Dana Glover is)

Annoying things about this week:

• I only got maybe half of my “to do” list finished this week at work. I seriously was lost in the Bermuda Triangle of PR this week.
• Annoying people who talk to you while you’re sitting at your desk, obviously busy and on the phone. (Bonus points if the person talking to you doesn’t even work in your section and has no reason to need your assistance.)
  
• Obnoxious people who cannot answer simple, reasonable questions posed in an e-mail and instead choose to rudely bring the topic up in front of 10 other co-workers at lunch time. (Bonus if the obnoxious person tries to make you feel stupid for not knowing everything about your company three weeks into your job.) (Extra bonus if the person is so rude to you that other people feel awkward and leave the lunch room early because they’d rather go work than witness such rudeness.)
• I somehow misread what is included in my new cell phone package and ended up being charged for $15 worth of text messages from last month.
  

Cool things about this week:

• It is over.
  
• Happy hour
• Found a cool new sandwich shop for lunch
• I get to be out of the office most of the next.
• Flirty e-mails

Things I want to see happen next week:

• Flirty phone calls and drinks (!)
• Shopping
• Actual accomplishments at work
• Comments from my three blog visitors. (Seriously, I know I’ve been boring lately, but things are gonna get better. I swear!) (Comment, people, comment!)

So, my weekend was boring. Totally. I had sushi and a few glasses of wine with the girls. We talked jobs and real estate. Bo-RING!

What else … I bought a new pair of cute black pointy shoes because I pretty much killed my other ones. Then I spent like $40 at Target on pretty much NOTHING. So odd.

I slipped into bed around 10:30 Sunday night, feeling a bit like I was in a rut. It was a classic example of one area of your life going well and another becoming problematic. My solution was to start back the gym regularly, which would give me more energy and make me feel better. (I didn’t go to the gym today. But tomorrow, I swear. The gym bag is packed!)

Anyway, I took some allergy medicine and crashed and then got up and went to work, where I discovered an e-mail from the elusive T, who’s last contact with me was to call once and not leave a message. I figured he’d blown me off and was almost over it.

He was responding to a mass e-mail I sent out reminding my posse (I am so lame!) about our standing Wednesday night drink ritual at the martini bar. I send one out every week to between 15 and 20 people. I remember thinking that the one I sent out this week was lame because I included my phone number on the bottom and said, “Call if you need anything.” I meant for people to call if they wanted to know who was coming or if they wanted a designated driver or if they wanted to know if we were at the bar. But that came out, “Call if you need anything.”

Now, I have invited T to many a function via e-mail. I am the queen of Evite. I spend a lot of time in front of the computer, as do most of my friends, so we do a lot of party planning online. Also, I find Evites are easier because you can invite a lot of people quickly and they can invite their friends quickly and so on. Blah. I’m going to quit shilling for Evite.

So, T has NEVER replied to an invite personally. Ever. I was a bit concerned when I saw his e-mail because I was half worried he was e-mailing me to tell me not to invite him to things anymore. Stranger things have happened.

Anyway, he thanked me for the invite, and closed with, “Ha. I can call you if I need anything?”

Short but sweet. I almost fell out of my chair. Not a profession of love, but a reconnection and a flirtation. I giggled like a schoolgirl. I was very pleased.

I wrote several responses, but scrapped them as they all sounded either too slutty or not sexy enough. (”Anything. Anytime. Anywhere” = too slutty, “You have my number, call it” = not sexy enough.) I finally went with, “Of course. Did you have anything in particular in mind?” Short and to the point — I let him know that he can and should call and I got some insinuation in there. And, the question is open, so he can respond. But, if he doesn’t, it isn’t as if I left a lot out there.

So perfect. You would think I was a professional communicator or something.

So, I’m expecting either another e-mail or a phone call sometime this week. I’m giddy.

Also, B called tonight and asked me to drinks. I said no. He seemed a touch surprised. For months the boy acts like an ass to me and blows me off to hang out with other people. So I stop calling him and now he’s invited me out several times during the past few weeks.

Something’s in the water and I swear it better stay there long enough for me to get laid.

(And yes, the title of this post is from Bridget Jones — either the first movie or one of the books. I can’t recall which.)

A guy a dated (and I use the word “dated” loosely) freshman year of college (and then we “dated” when he was in town for a night or two) has a blog that I occasionally check out … anyway, he has a photo gallery on it.

He’s gotten a lot hotter since the last time I saw him … or maybe it’s the tie … or maybe the lack of boys currently in my life …

Bad. I am so bad. (I bet I go to the gym like everyday next week. I’m a loser.)