Is that so? April 24, 2006
Posted by charmingbutsingle in Uncategorized.trackback
“I had a picture of the baby, and everyone thought he was my grandson,” Mom announced as we gossiped in Southern style, around the cleared table, munching on angel food cake and pistachio pudding, a cool Sunday dessert.
“And I said, ‘No no!’ He’s my NEPHEW,” she said emphatically. “My friends are just amazed that I’m not more upset about not having grandchildren.”
My mom took a sip of iced tea and looked on as the baby in question, my cousin, slept soundly in my arms. I’d been holding him and cooing at him and he’d slipped into sleep before I could put him down.
“Oh really?” I asked, almost accusatorily.
My grandmother interrupted to give me pointers on holding the baby. My aunt interrupted to point out that as the oldest of all of the grandchildren, I was quite skilled in baby handling. I could feel a satisfied smile coming across my face in appreciation that someone recognized the number of diapers I’d changed and bottles I’d made over the years.
“Yes,” Mom said. “Well, I always tell my friends that if y’all had kids, it would be a case of kids raising kids.”
“Is that so?” I brushed my fingertips across the child’s cheek and listened to his gentle breathing. I didn’t disagree. But I wanted to make a point.
“Then why are you trying to set me up with every divorcee who crosses your path?”
I angled my iced tea glass so I wouldn’t drop condensation on the baby’s head and pointed my eyes to Mom.
“Well, I want you to be with SOMEONE,” she said, emphasizing the last word as if I am all alone, free of human interaction.
“Yes, honey,” my grandmother interrupted, again.
“A woman needs a companion.”
i think it’s written in the mom book of code conduct, that you want your daughter married off. and you don’t stop making comments of the sort until that actually happens.
You have to love those Southern women. It’s all about marrying, and marrying well for them, isn’t it?
ooo… That little story made me bristle.
But really, the word was “companion” not husband.
I get the comments every now and then myself. Usually they come to a screeching halt (especially those regarding grandchildren) when I reply with a well timed “Well, if you give me 20 minutes I can go take care of that problem for you. Now where did I put so and so’s (so and so being one of my ex’s they hated) phone number…”
yeah, southern mothers do not discriminate between sons and daughters on this issue. However, I scared my mom to death with “Oh you want a grandkid, I can take care of that TONIGHT! Give me 9 months and we can put you in a grandmother’s chair.” She has only hinted around at it now, but very very tentatively.
What is it with some mothers? It’s like they’d prefer you to marry someone, anyone, even if he’s a wife-beating loser dipshit who will never get a job or get it up, than be alone. But god forbid you said that your mother, she’d just tell you “Oh stop being so pessimistic. That’s why you don’t have a husband.”
my mother never pressures me or my sister about having children (but that’s because she’s too vain to want to admit that she’s old enough to BE a grandmother!) HAH!
lol that sounds like a frustrating conversation
maybe this is one of those things we won’t understand until we are in their shoes???
i agree– my mom doesn’t know what she’s asking for. i made a joke about her being a future grandma and she almost choked on her water.
she stuttered, “I…I am not OLD ENOUGH to be a GRANDmother!!” –she has since laid off a bit.
maybe start telling them you are a lesbian. that should throw them for a while, right?