From bad to worse December 17, 2006
Posted by charmingbutsingle in Uncategorized.trackback
A few nights ago I was sitting in the cigar bar with Prom Date, after having been out to two bars after work with co-workers. I spied The Blackberry across the bar. He was talking with a Tall Man and it took me a few minutes to realize that they were looking at me pointedly.
The Blackberry came over.
“What did you and your friend have to say about me?” I asked The Blackberry
“Oh, he wants to f—k you.”
I almost choked on a sip of Merlot. I dismissed him as being silly.
But then the Tall Man came up behind The Blackberry and mouthed, “I want you.”
I raised an eyebrow.
“I want you,” he mouthed again and motioned to the bathroom.
I grimaced and shook my head.
They walked off and I died laughing, “Do I look like the woman who has sex in the bathroom of a bar?”
A few minutes later, The Blackberry was back.
“You should thank me. I got that guy to go away.”
“Oh. Really?”
“Yes, I told him you were my girl.”
The Blackberry needs to have his head examined. By a team of professionals.
Have you considered a restraining order?
I would have thrown the merlot in his face.
Oh. My. God.
You’ve got to be kidding me..
Did he really think that was going to work? Who does that?
Y’all, I seriously think that he thinks that I’m going to put down my wine glass one night and say, “Let’s go!” and then drag him to my place and ravage him all night.
Riiiiiight.
Something along the lines of ‘frying pan’ and ‘fire’ comes to mind… Unlucky.
Lxx
Ew ew ew. Slime bag. What a loser!
Oi. This is usually the point where I either get mean or burst out laughing… Hm. I guess that’s kind of mean too…
Either way, he would deserve it
I think Blackberry played one too many games of Leisure Suit Larry.
ew. “I’d rather take vows to join a convent.”
vomit.
you do know, of course, that taking him home just ONCE would solve this problem. Perhaps you could spike his merlot? Or instead, when he strips down, you could just start laughing… like “ha ha ha. Oh my. I shouldn’t laugh. But you poor poor boy. I know, its really not funny - giggle - how on earth do you pee much less have sex? Never mind. I’ve changed my mind. Pity only goes so far. I’ll take care of myself tonight, thanks. Good luck with that.”
oh my gosh! that’s just crazy. my friend said something recently bout “out of the frying pan and into the fire” which i think suits this.
OK here’s what you do with your pal Mr. BB. Get yourself a small sack of #8 or 9 birdshot from the local Sporting Goods place. A carton of BB’s from Walmart will do fine too. Find a large, sturdy, (wool preferably) tube sock. Fill the sock with as much BB’s as it can hold. Tie off the top of the sock carefully with a string. (No, rubber bands will not do here). Then stuff the sock into a small decorative clutch purse with a sturdy strap, leather preferred. Do some practice swings with this before heading out to the bars. The next time you get an ultra rude proposition, swing the purse wildly about his legs, you’ll hit something for sure. In desperate cases you’d swing for the head, but that’s more likely to be thought of as ‘assault’. That’s the closest most guys will ever get to actually hearing & Understanding “F*ck off”. And of course it’ll only add to your rep. Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’
VJ — Um, that’s creepy.
The more I read about BB the more I dislike him.
You do know he told his friend he was having sex with you ….
I would have yelled at him. Told him to leave me the F* alone! damm nut case.
Seriously….who does he think he is????
Not hardly as creepy as Mr. BB. That’s the way they typically handled ‘mashers’ back in the day. 30 years before that they did it less gently with a quick poke from a hat pin. But ladies stopped wearing hats in the 60’s mostly. As Justin Wilson would say, I Guar-an-tee that it’ll make a lasting impression on the man. You’d not be bothered by him for the rest of his time in residence in town. Until then, he’ll be the persistent ugly boil that can not be lanced. He won’t take no for an answer until he’s been confronted, and possibly embarrassed publicly. IMHO. Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’
VJ — I’m not going to physically assault a man to get him to leave me alone. He may be a jerk, but he hasn’t threatened my safety …
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http://www.Singleshunt.com
this post is a good example of how men can get slapped. or have glasses of wine splashed in their faces.
assholes. both of them.