Someday … right? November 25, 2007
Posted by charmingbutsingle in College was Fun, Friends, NaBloPoMo, Seriously!, Single Girl Cliches, We Get It -- You're Stressed About Getting Old.trackback
The afternoon started with text messages:
Me: Movie you have in mind?
Guy Friend: August Rush or Enchanted?
Me: Saw August Rush with my family. Fred Claus or Enchanted?
Decision made. I love having my gay boyfriend back in town. It was the two of us, Diet Coke and movie popcorn at a PG movie, drooling over the same man. He will never judge me for wanting to see bad movies, as he probably wants to see them himself. Now, if we could just get him to share my love of Vince Vaughn, we’d be set.
I almost feel bad about complaining about Enchanted because, well, I knew it was going to suck. But it’s been raining all day and I really just figured I could leave the house and see a movie or stay in and watch one alone. (Or continue torturing myself by looking at the online baby photo album The Nurse’s girlfriend put online. And, well, yes it was my fault for finding the photo album. I shouldn’t have been MySpace spying. And as annoying as it may be to see pictures of your ex and his baby, the “family” pictures of them with the baby are seared into my mind so that I will never consider his advances. And yes, there have been some.) And I took two college classes that talked about fairy tales and gender roles, so I was mildly interested in this modern portrayal.
Fine, that last reason is kind of crap, though I did actually discuss those topics in my classes. Did I mention that McDreamy was in the movie?
For a fleeting moment, I thought they might take it in a satirical, princes aren’t real, get over your fairy tale, forget the happy ending, move on direction. Because I am a complete idealist, obviously. But this is a Disney movie and Disney makes it billions off of selling an ideal of castles and white knights and glitter and doves in heart-shaped flower arrangements. I don’t feel as if I’m spoiling things by saying that the movie ends exactly how you think it will. (And Idina Menzel’s character, of course, gets screwed after putting in five years to a relationship with an issues-having, workaholic single father.) But as I slouched in my seat and my friend whispered, “I feel so sorry for him, did he not read the script before he signed the deal?” I couldn’t help but feel a touch outraged for the swarms of young girls watching the movie, hoping upon hope that someday their prince would come. Being sure that they’d have the fairy tale wedding and ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after forever (and ever).
But I decided against making a scene, against telling them all that one day after being groped by drunk guys at a bar or going on a string of bad dates or being ignored by a guy they’d gone out with, they will collapse on their couch, exasperated, kick off their heels and curse loudly about how they would like their happy ending now, please.
Because, really, yelling at six year olds is an ill-advised way to go through life. Truth be told, that’s a realization I wouldn’t want to keep them from having on their own – there is something oddly reassuring in sitting in your own apartment and realizing that Prince Charming maybe hasn’t shown up but you’re still okay on your own. It gives me hope that I’m looking for a companion and partner and not someone to save me from a life of my own making.
So, I kept my self-righteous feminist monologue to myself and did what us modern maidens do on a rainy Sunday evenings: let the gourmet market cook dinner, stretch out on my bed with my laptop to finish a last-minute project and watch a re-run of America’s Next Top Model.
The Good the Bad & the Ugly.
The good; going to a nice tawdry bit with your gay best BF.
The bad; ‘…torturing myself by looking at the online baby photo album The Nurse’s girlfriend put online’. No excuses, that’s just stupid. Still worse; ‘the “family” pictures of them with the baby are seared into my mind so that I will never consider his advances. And yes, there have been some.)’. Why some sub genre violence was not directed towards him then is beyond our comprehension.
The Ugly; ‘And I took two college classes that talked about fairy tales and gender roles, so I was mildly interested in this modern portrayal’ This is like looking for interesting entrails for your anatomy project from car crashes. Yes, they’re out there, but yes, we already know the condition they are likely to be found in, right? As you said, Disney. Think Kiddies. Fairy Tales. Comforting sorts of lies we’ve been telling our children for generations. Most will never meet a prince, or royalty. Some will still want and need rescuing. But most will out grow the afflictions of their younger selves. They’ll have to in order just to survive.
More ugly; the verisimilitude of this bit; ‘don’t feel as if I’m spoiling things by saying that the movie ends exactly how you think it will. (And Idina Menzel’s character, of course, gets screwed after putting in five years to a relationship with an issues-having, workaholic single father.)’ Yeah, reality bites, even in the movies. Just to make certain you were paying attention, and to give it that fake veneer & gloss of reality.
And of this? ‘But I decided against making a scene, against telling them…[About their Prince Charming ']. What can age ever tell youth that they’ll listen to? Modern maidens can at least sleep well knowing that the older set of ‘fairy tales’ & fables that I grew up with have been so bowdlerized & censored as to be fairly mild by comparison. No one gets killed (at least needlessly or gratuitously), and women as such are not being punished, shunned, avoided, ostracized, belittled, mocked or beaten with surprising regularity by such & sundry in each & every one of them, just for Being of ‘the fairer/weaker sex’!
That’s an advantage they may never even know or recognize, but one that most real older ’self-righteous feminists’ just might.
So pablum from Disney, liked and found acceptable for & by tweens. They’ve got the market pegged & they cater to it. It’s a business transaction now, and that’s very hard to object to on the grounds of it’s popularity. Either you like the pablum they’re dishing out, or you opt out. It’s the Sibelius Violin Concerto in D minor for your kiddies & no TV. With those extra Karate lessons for them too. And they’ll be bent in another way. But secretly they might someday wish for their ‘Prince’ too, despite it all. For that is the power of myth in culture!
Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’
Forget the princes, go for that weird alchemist in the castle basement who says he can get machines to do math faster than a human. I’m just ’sayin, is all.
What’s wrong with yelling at six-year-olds anyway? Somebody’s got to get them off the Disney addiction…
Wow…I watched an America’s Next Top Model rerun last night too! Spooky!
I was going to see Enchanted myself next weekend…maybe now I’ll pick August Rush instead
Nah, it’s just so popular now, everyone’s going now!
[http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/entertainment/7112677.stm]
“Fairy tale enchants US film fans
US cinemagoers have fallen under the spell of Enchanted, a modern-day fairy tale starring Amy Adams.
The Disney film, which sees a cartoon princess exiled to real-life New York, topped the US and Canada box office, taking $35.3m (£17m) over the weekend.
Second place went to family comedy This Christmas, which took $18.6m (£8.9m), while animated fantasy Beowulf dropped to third, taking $16.2m (£7.8m).
The top five was rounded out by action film Hitman and animation Bee Movie.
Early studio estimates suggest that the top 12 films took $218.1m (£105.5m) over the five-day Thanksgiving weekend, which ran from Wednesday to Sunday.
Film studios will be pleased at the figures, which come after a two month-long slump at the box office.
US AND CANADA BOX OFFICE
1. Enchanted - $35.3m (£17m)
2. This Christmas - $18.6m (£8.9m)
3. Beowulf (pictured) - $16.2m (£7.8m)
4. Hitman - $13m (£6.3m)
5. Bee Movie - $12m (£5.8m)
Source: Media By Numbers
“This is good news for Hollywood,” said Paul Dergarabedian, president of box office analysts Media By Numbers. “This could end up being the second or third-biggest Thanksgiving weekend ever.”
Disney’s Enchanted took $50m (£24.1m) over the five-day weekend, making it the second highest Thanksgiving debut ever.
Only Toy Story 2 has fared better, with receipts of $80m (£36.8m) in 1999.
It has gained overwhelmingly positive reviews, in particular for leading lady Adams, previously best known for her Oscar-nominated role in quirky comedy Junebug.
“She truly has just this incredible exuberance you don’t often see on screen,” said the film’s producer, Barry Josephson.
“She is a big surprise for people who don’t know her. It’s a breakout role.”
Enchanted is released in the UK on 14 December”.
Via The BBC
Some of us grew up wanting to slay dragons, raid Tombs, and better mankind through the power of science. Perhaps that’s the boys’ side of things. You wish for the White Knight, we wish to BE that knight. I never received my armor, though. Mayhap it was lost in the mail.
It is hard to let the myth live on, I agree. But if we tell them life is no fairy tale we’d have to take away ALL the magic. No Santa Claus, no Tooth Fairy, no Easter Bunny. Everything that makes being a kid amazing. Much like the lack of their existance is known through age so too is the lesson you want to extoll best learned.
And if it helps, some of us guys have those moments of wishing for the happy ending NOW, too. I know I have. Personally, I want to see August Rush and Martian Child. Addicted to sappy romantic/comedy/tear jerkers (though rarely with actual tears, they do tug the heart strings).
I snuck into this movie in between seeing August Rush and This Christmas, and I felt like maybe if I was high it would be enjoyable. As a rule I love Amy Adams, and I thought it would be a total riff on all the crap Disney has poured into impressionable minds for the past 80 years. Sad to see that’s not the case.
Although I did get a kick out of the witch sending Amy to “a place where there are no happy endings…” and then her ending up in New York City. Ha!
Yep, I’ll take my happy ending now, please. In fact I would have taken it about 5-7 years ago. But, we don’t control or even get to decide what ends up happening in the love department. Hopefully (and I do believe hope is the one thing one should never lose, fairy tale or not), there is a plan and there is a “prince”, it’s just a matter of time.
Oh how I’ve always wanted a gay boyfriend.
As much as I would like to think that I am my wife’s prince charming or knight in shining armor I doubt it’s true. Unless princes and knights leave their dirty clothes at the end of the bed, constantly answer questions with ambiguous answers like “Ok” or “Sure”. Maybe they also insist on keeping the A/C set at a temperature that is just one degree below comfortable. I tend to think that maybe my wife is just one of those saintly women who instead of waiting for her own prince charming, took pity on a lesser man like myself. Every day since has been happily ever after… man that last bit was corny.
Okay, now I know what not to watch. And sometimes, me loves a gay boy friend to pal around with more than many of the girls!
“It gives me hope that I’m looking for a companion and partner and not someone to save me from a life of my own making.”
You are fabulous. Thank you
I’m still waiting for my happy ending. It’s been put on hold. Something tells me it’s never going to happen, though.
I do miss my gay boyfriend, though. He lives far away from me, now, and I have yet to find a suitable replacement.
“Yep, I’ll take my happy ending now, please”. The essential problem is that for some seriously bent guys of a certain age the real happy ending, ended with the decommissioning of SAC, or the demise of Gen. Curtis LeMay. And I know there’s no one here who knows what the hell I’m talking about it.
But I like BC3… found my happy ending. The wife never needed rescuing, never thought much of fairy tales, and more or less as a direct result can usually out think any 4 people I know. And as John Prine would put it, ‘In spite of ourselves, we’re the big door prize’. I can’t tell you how to get there, all I can tell you is that fantasy and fairy tales had a vanishingly small role to play, if at all in it.
Never wait on salvation or deliverance. Plan & build for it and when the right pieces arrive, you’ll be prepared to act on your dreams.
Cheers & Good Luck, ‘VJ’
I really enjoyed this post - very reassuring to know that someone else feels the same way. We all want our happy ending, but it’s hard to actually admit it when we’re supposed to be modern, independent women. And even though it’s great to be modern and independent, it would be nice to have Prince Charming sweep us off our feet every once in a while. Don’t give up hope. : )
I really wanted to see Enchanted but couldn’t find anyone else to go with. The boyfriend doesn’t want to watch me drool over McDreamy
I just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed this post
More on fairy tales & myths here in common period adverts: Cheers, ‘VJ’
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/femail/article.html?in_article_id=496827&in_page_id=1879&in_a_source=