Charming, but single

To The Best (Gonna Get Hitched) College Roommate Ever –

I am just tickled pink to be writing this letter to you, tears and all. Because I love you so much that it is hard sometimes to be so far away. Especially now, when you’re newly engaged and I just want to give you weepy hugs and coo over your ring in person.

If you would have told me back in, say, 2000, that I would one day be giddily clicking through pages on TheKnot.com and suggesting dress colors for your wedding, well, I would have called you nuts. I remember meeting you through work at college – you were wearing a red boatneck shirt from Old Navy.  And I know that sounds creepy that I remember that, but the thing is that I owned that shirt and wore it all of the time and you’re one of about six people on earth who would appreciate that I even noticed that.

You seemed standoffish and I was as loud as ever. We weren’t friends at first because I mistook your shyness for snobiness. But one night, for whatever reason, we went out together. My first night at what at once became my favorite college bar, where’d we eventually chug too many beers, down too many shots, make numerous ill-advised decisions.

You were fun and beautiful and friendly in smaller groups on more comfortable terms. We quickly bonded over shared past heartaches and hurts that I don’t have to list out – you know what I mean and that’s all that matters. We were both wounded and though we should have perhaps reached for less self-destructive escapes, we were relatively socially inseparable for those last few years in college. And though we are quite different – you embraced your inner pink years ago and I’m only recently acknowledging mind – our relationship worked. I have a bond with you that I share with no one else, and for better or for worse I know that for some feelings, some sadness, only you will truly understand.

I haven’t always been the best friend and I wasn’t the best roommate. Money was tight, I am emotional and our group of guys and girls and booze hardly made for the most settled lifestyle. Also, I always used to forget that we didn’t have a garbage disposal and I never cleaned the kitchen and I don’t know how many eggplant peels you fished out of the sink during my vegetarian days.

But you’ve loved me in spite of that and I adore your patience. I miss playing hermit together while watching “Sex and the City” marathons and eating Chinese food, how you’d tease me because I used to yell “Bam!” while I cooked alongside Emeril on TV and groaning over the first season of the terrible MTV reality show “Sorority Life” while we gagged and ordered the other to “Make it a double, Sweetie.” I miss road trips to football games, comparing notes on men, lounging on Sunday nights in the apartment complex hot tub and taking care of each other when one of us was heartbroken, or inebriated or grumpy. You comfort me better than anyone else I know and really deserve a place in heaven for putting up with me when I was at my most heartbroken yet.

Because I know the ups and downs you’ve endured in your life, how beautiful your heart is and how shockingly talented you are, I’ve waited for so long for a man who looked at you with adoration, excitement and recognition of your value. That is what I see in your future husband’s eyes. And I love him for it. He treats you like an equal, but spoils you when he can. He is supportive and respectful of your sensitive side and nature. A class act all around, as worthy of your companionship and love as you are his.

Things will not always be easy, but you know that. If you’re even half as committed to and patient with him as you’ve been with me, well, you’re destined to a lifelong marriage and I’ll just have to live with the fact that I have competition in the best friend category.

Love,

Your Charming (and Emotional) Maid of Honor

P.S. There is still time to appoint someone else as your Maid of Honor, given my near-miss on the last bridesmaid dress I was charged with ordering. Should you proceed with me in the Maid of Honor role, I promise to order the dress the second you given me the go ahead. For real.